Hoffmania!

Dick Morris on Palin: FABulous!

Yeah. Someone of presidential timbre is "FABulous"! We do indeed look for fabulousness in our leaders. Simply fabulous!

MORRIS: You know, I think Sarah Palin was fabulous during the campaign. I'm not one of those that think she hurt the ticket. I think she gave McCain a lead for three weeks, and that was terrific. And I think the stuff she's doing now with the tea parties and everything is fabulous.

Gather 'Round! It's Forehead Slappin' Time!

Hey, look at the great idea the Heritage Foundation has.

The U.S. government response should be bold and decisive. It must mobilize U.S. civilian and military capabilities for short-term rescue and relief and long-term recovery and reform. President Obama should tap high-level, bipartisan leadership. Clearly former President Clinton, who was already named as the U.N. envoy on Haiti, is a logical choice. President Obama should also reach out to a senior Republican figure, perhaps former President George W. Bush, to lead the bipartisan effort for the Republicans.

(SLAP!) Yup. Mr. Katrina himself. (SLAP!) That'd be a bi-intelligent effort, you dipshits.

This is a three-slapper. (SLAP!)

HAHAHAHAHAHA. Barney Frank is GAY.

Dining Room Table King Rush Limbaugh made a funny because gay people are weirdos.

"Isn't it an established fact that Barney Frank himself spends most of his time living around Uranus?"

Uproarious. And the dining room tables loved it.

Palin: Obama Will Kill My Baby

I guess their philosophy is to lie - but do it in such an outrageous way that their goon followers will be shocked into believing it. If Sarah's looking for evil, she can see it from her bathroom - in the mirror.

In a new posting on her Facebook account, former Gov. Sarah Palin (R-AK) made a dire statement about health care reform -- that it could result in an Obama-created "death panel" killing her infant son with Down Syndrome:

The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down Syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama's "death panel" so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their "level of productivity in society," whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil.

People who read know there's no such thing as a "level of productivity in society" clause in any of this. In fact, the whole idea of this health care reform is to provide insurance for everyone. Remember?

How did that message get mangled? And who's going to unmangle it? Sorry, Rahm...I gotta say it. Push back hard on this, Dems. DO something.

And if Sarah wants to see government make life or death decisions, she needs to see how seniors are monitored in Florida. Back in the deep red days there, we had to move my mom out of there because the state demanded she be placed in a Florida 24-hour care facility - which is the very definition of a "death panel."

Radio Shack Becomes "The Shack"

Yes...it's true. I don't know one human who ever referred to it as "The Shack." That's the name of a restaurant in every city in America, but Radio Shack was always Radio Shack. Dumbest. Idea. Ever.

We're Not All Like This in California

But we have to have something to compare the smart people to.

And Zell Should Use Crazy Glue for His Mouth

Gorilla Glue for Obama's chair. Good one, Zell.

They Get Elected

Rep. Darrell Issa truly is King of Planet Retard.

What If Sotomayor Were a Transsexual Martian? Or a Tree?

That's almost as stupid as "What if Sotomayor Were White?" And that's The American Spectator, my friends.

Jesus Christ

I mean, Jesus Christ. Really?

Krugman: Anti-Green Faction Losing Its Mind

Funny, yet frightening.

Clearly, opposition to doing something about climate change has fallen back to a new position: claims that attempting to limit greenhouse gas emissions would be incredibly costly. Yet the most careful studies, like the big MIT study of Congressional proposals, find only modest costs. Pay no attention, say the critics.

I found Robert Samuelson’s latest...all I can say is, huh?

Here’s the key graf in which Samuelson tries to deny the results of the studies:

The trouble is that these models embody wildly unrealistic assumptions: There are no business cycles; the economy is always at “full employment”; strong growth is assumed, based on past growth rates; the economy automatically accommodates major changes — if fossil fuel prices rise (as they would under anti-global-warming laws), consumers quickly use less and new supplies of “clean energy” magically materialize.

I don’t think there’s a single thing there that’s right.

Peggy Noonan: Diddling is Impeachable, War Crimes Aren't

Nice catch from Andrew:

"The Democrats had long labeled the impeachment debate a distraction from the urgent business of a great nation. But the Republicans argued that the pursuit of justice is the business of a great nation. In winning this point, they caught the falling flag, producing a triumph for the rule of law, a reassertion of the belief that no man is above it, and a rebuke for an arrogance that had grown imperial." - Peggy Noonan, December 21. 1998.

"It’s hard for me to look at a great nation issuing these documents and sending them out to the world and thinking, ‘Oh, much good will come of that.’ Sometimes in life you want to keep walking… Some of life has to be mysterious." - Peggy Noonan, April 19, 2009.

This little comment from Peg on ABC's This Week is shaping up to be her downfall. It's time for her to stick her fingers in her ears and say "La la la la" all the way into oblivion.

Ahem

Uh...HEY, JACKHOLES:

Update at 12:05 p.m. ET: Obama calls Tax Day "an important opportunity for those of us in Washington to consider our responsibility to the people who sent us here and who pay the bills."

He touts his payroll tax cut, which he campaigned on and which started showing up in paychecks April 1, as "the most progressive tax cut in American history." Obama says the tax cut "will reach 120 million families and put $120 billion directly into their pockets, and it includes the most American workers ever to get a tax cut."

Yeah. Look at your paychecks. Unless you're docked for taking today off for this bullshit, of course.

He's a Fayishist

Becuz he is. Why? Because he's a fayishist. Why is he a fayishist? Becuz he is.

It's comforting to know that this will be the most-watched video of the day's idiocy. Note the hat. A pure dittohead in his talking points and his fashion sense.

ARM-AROUND-THE-QUEEN-GATE!!!

Really? First, the fake scandal over the iPod, now this? GET A LIFE.

"See? All Obama Wants To Do Is Take Over Companies and Fire People!"

Swear to God, one of my pals who I try to avoid talking politics with said that.

My response: Really? Then why would he want to take over a crapbucket of a company like GM? Trust me, he doesn't want GM. He knows he'd be better off opening a restaurant or going the MLM route. But hell no, not GM.

Now if he wanted to take over Haliburton/KBR and fire all of their management, I'd be all over that...

The GOP Flatlines Again

We made note of this in our live coverage of the Obama town hall meeting, which was unceremoniously interrupted by Boehner, Cantor and a parade of GOP blowhards who were supposedly going to unveil THEIR budget plan...which they never did. They only used the time to do a hatchet job on Obama and Pelosi.

We also noted that around ten minutes into this display of white-hot anger and name-calling, Contessa Brewer of MSNBC cut in to make note of the fact that they weren't giving any solutions as they had promised - and they never returned to them.

How in God's name did they get so horrible at golden opportunities like this? Instead of showing America they really want to fix this mess, they instead put on a complain clinic. Just unbelievably stupid.

Kos chronicled the fun.

Oy.

CALLER: I believe it is the first amendment that specifically states that a law cannot be passed to specifically target a person or a group of people.

[RNC Chairman MICHAEL] STEELE: That’s right!

Hoist by/with/on Judicial Watch's Own Petard*

CLASSIC FAIL. Judicial Watch tried to smear Nancy Pelosi with a fairy tale about her demanding to use military aircraft for her personal use and got a snootful of documents under the Freedom of Information Act to try to prove it.

ABC News got the info dump. The result? Not a goddamned thing. Except, oh...that Dennis Hastert DID abuse the privilege.

As we said. CLASSIC conservative fail.

The treasure trove of documents obtained by Judicial Watch from the Department of Defense regarding Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi's use of military aircraft doesn't seem to prove the organization's allegation that Pelosi has made "unprecedented demands" for the flights.

In fact, it appears that Pelosi uses military aircraft less often than her predecessor, former Speaker of the House Dennis Hastert.

The documents cover the period from January 2007 to November 2008 and show that Pelosi made the equivalent of 20 round-trips between Washington (Andrews Air Force Base) and San Francisco. That's an average of less than one round-trip per month. In contrast, former Speaker Hastert traveled home to his Illinois district virtually every weekend and, his former aides tell ABC News, he would almost always travel on military aircraft. Like Hastert, Pelosi also occasionally leads Congressional delegations on foreign trips (the documents show six foreign trips: one to Asia, three to the Middle East and two to Europe).

The documents obtained by Judicial Watch also disprove another frequently repeated rumor about Pelosi's travel: that she regularly flies home to San Francisco in an Air Force C-40, the military equivalent of a Boeing 737. According to the documents, Pelosi did not make any domestic trips on a C-40 during the 23-month period from January 2007 to November 2008. Her trips to San Francisco have all been on smaller executive aircraft, usually an Air Force C-20 (the equivalent of a Gulfstream G-3) or a more plush C-37 (a Gulfstream G-5).

*Pick one. No one can agree on/with/by this.

And I Still Don't Miss the L.A. Times

Why anyone in this town still reads this crap is beyond me.

So Many GOP Jackasses to Choose From...

...but we choose Rep. Eric Cantor as the Jackass Du Jour.

A top congressional Republican on Sunday criticized President Barack Obama's expected decision to reverse the Bush administration's limits on embryonic stem-cell research, calling it a distraction from the country's economic slump.

"Why are we going and distracting ourselves from the economy? This is job No. 1. Let's focus on what needs to be done," Rep. Eric Cantor, the Republican whip in the House of Representatives, told CNN's "State of the Union."

Eric's right, folks. Saving American lives, putting American scientists to work, leading America toward the cure for myriad mystery diseases for the world, giving Americans a second chance at a healthy life...

...just a fucking distraction from the GOP's whining and bleating.

Yeah. He's Gay.

No question. Anyone this strident (and Republican) is hiding something. Ladies and Gentlemen...meet Utah state senator Chris Buttars. (That last name? Yeah. He is.)

"Homosexuality will always be a sexual perversion. And you say that around here now and everybody goes nuts. But I don't care."

Just one year ago, Buttars found himself in hot water locally and nationally for this comment on the senate floor.

"This baby is black...this is a dark, ugly thing."

And even though Buttars says in the documentary interview,..."the ACLU - bless their black hearts...," it’s his other comments which may get the strongest reaction.

Like this one which the documentary maker confirms is about gays.

"They're mean. They want to talk about being nice. They're the meanest buggers I have ever seen."

And just seconds later, Buttars draws a comparison between some gays and radical Muslims.

“It's just like the Muslims. Muslims are good people and their religion is anti-war. But it’s been taken over by the radical side.”

Buttars also claims he's "killed" every gay rights bill in the legislature for the last 8 years.

He also talks about gay marriage being the beginning of the end.

Buttars: "What is the morals of a gay person? You can't answer that because anything goes."

And finally, this is how senator Buttars refers to the "radical gay movement."

"They're probably the greatest threat to America going down I know of."

Seriously - Stupid People Must Be Punished

If you carry naked pictures of your wife on your freakin' CEL PHONE and you lose it, they should be shown on freakin' NBC, not the internet. Idiots among us must be identified.